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Mayor's Race

Two Comedians Battle for London

By Sebastian Borger in London

One candidate is a former Trotskyite and sounds like a markets guru. His rival has lots of jokes, but little political experience. Londoners will have a tough time choosing a mayor on Thursday -- but at least they have been thoroughly entertained by Ken Livingstone and Boris Johnson.

At the beginning of this week, the basement rooms of London's City Hall were underwater. Telephones and computers weren't working, meeting rooms were unusable -- and, for a short time at least, it appeared as though the broken water main might scupper the local elections in the British capital on Thursday.

That might not have been such a terrible thing for some Londoners, though. It might have given them a few extra minutes of the free performance from a comedy duo that they would normally have to pay good money to see. They also would have been spared a ballot-box decision that won't be much fun for anyone: a match-up between a tired titleholder tainted by corruption allegations and a challenger who has a knack for saying the right things but no experience as a municipal administrator.

And though incumbent Ken Livingstone, the 62-year-old popularly known as Red Ken, may claim that he is sick and tired of his encounters with conservative challenger Boris Johnson, he has also offered the 43-year-old a job in his office if he is elected for a third, four-year stint as mayor. "At some point, he has to learn to lead," Livingstone said, patronizingly, during a debate between the two candidates at the headquarters of news agency Reuters in the city's Canary Wharf district earlier this month.

Johnson countered his rival by saying that he is the only serious candidate with "years of private sector business experience" stemming from his time as the editor in chief of the conservative Spectator magazine. Livingstone poked back, saying "running the Spectator was a relatively easy and undemanding job -- after the difficult decision about where to go to lunch with the staff."

"Not that easy," the conservative replied. "I showed leadership!" The hall erupted with laughter.

Local Election Could Have National Implications

By the end of this week, one of these comedians will take over Great Britain's most important local political office. And though both remain outsiders within their parties, the head-to-head race could have symbolic implications for the whole country. Prime Minister Gordon Brown is hoping his party ally will win because Livingstone's defeat could worsen an already bad mood amongst Labour Party voters.

Meanwhile, opposition leader David Cameron is hoping for a boost for the Tories. If a conservative can win over the electorate in greater London, it could also buoy Cameron's own chances and help pave the way for the conservative to move in to 10 Downing Street after the next general election.

The ranks of the eight other candidates are led by a gay ex-cop. Brian Paddick, most recently a group director of a unit at Scotland Yard, joined the Liberal Democrats two years ago and is now representing Britain's third-largest party in the London election. In debates with Livingstone and Johnson, he has tried to position himself as the "only serious candidate." His comment, of course, led to a rebuttal from Johnson, who quipped: "This time your joke isn't half bad."

The campaign for mayor is Johnson's chance to present himself as a serious politician. Surrounded by a cortége of helpful aides, who are like prompters for a stage actor, the Tory candidate swings through outer districts of London, where people feel forgotten by public officials. Johnson talks to them about preserving all of London as a "Garden City." In fact, the 1,577-square-kilometer metropolis has gained 3,000 hectares of green space over the last 10 years: "That's 22 Hyde Parks," says Johnson. He wants to cut down on fare-dodgers, and forbid alcohol in public parks "on my first day." But he would keep a senior discount card for elderly Londoners. "My opponent should enjoy his retirement," he jokes.

Building Tycoons Like Left-Wing Livingstone

Livingstone seems to be truly tired. He routinely lists his achievements. He introduced a congestion charge for cars and promoted public mass transit. But downtown London is still jammed. He helped London win the 2012 Olympic Games. But the costs for the massive event have exploded. Building tycoons lie at his feet. And big business supports Livingstone, a former Trotskyite, who talks like a lobbyist for financial service providers. In London's financial district, he has said, "we need to have slightly less regulation than our competitors."

That some regulations were not adhered to under his watch has drawn the attention of the Criminal Investigation Department. They've investigated some of his close associates for corrupt contracts worth millions of pounds. The contracts went to organizations dealing with blacks and other minorities, and involved more than €4 million in public money.

The mayor says it was all just a "racist smear campaign." People should vote for him because "I'm worth it." Johnson, on the other hand, promises to "work for London like a berserker."

Whichever of them is elected on Thursday, it will be a sad day for fans of political humor.